Old Legs 2018 Tour
Blog Entry 22 - Day 3
The sprint finish into Cape Town aside, the other accolade up for grabs on the Old Legs Tour is the prestigious Dick of the Day trophy. Bruce scooped Day 1 hands down, asking us to unpack the trailer ten minutes after we finished packing the trailer. You need to know that the trailer is packed alphabetically, seventeen layers deep and Bruce’s bag with the passport in it was in the bottom left hand corner. The Dick of the Day award for Day 2 and Day 3 went to Dave Whitehead for multiple infractions, including an appalling inability to keep a track of his ride wardrobe. He’ll forget his head if we let him.
Today’s ride was 165 kms long, mostly with a tailwind blowing up our tender bottoms. Refreshed by the best night’s sleep ever, we rode out of Antelope Park with Ant Mellon and also my son Gary. Dave wanted to ride back into Gweru to buy a fire extinguisher for his bike but we wouldn’t let him. He read on a dodgy internet site somewhere that lions are repelled by fire extinguisher foam. It turns out that the crying we heard last night was Dave, not bush babies. He is properly scared that the Kalahari is full of hungry lions.
Our riding peloton was like a well oiled machine today, just without the oil. Because of a stiff side wind, we rode in box formation with the front left guy controlling the pace. Dave and Al put together a simple communication system to be used by the poor buggers in the back of peloton using their bicycle bells. One ring of the bell means go faster and two rings means slow down. Or maybe the other way round. But for sure I know that more than three rings is like the worse swear words possible. Suffice to say our peloton was like an elastic band and sounded like a Cathedral on a Sunday morning.
Toilet humor found its way onto the Old Legs Tour when, on our lunch break, Dave tried to sneak off into the bush surreptitiously with the toilet seat and a concerned look on his face and Ryan followed him with the drone. Thankfully the resultant footage has been pulled by the censors.
Today’s ride was hugely poignant for Al Watermeyer. He rode into Bulawayo on the bike that his late son Tim bought but never got to ride. But for sure Tim was there in spirit.
165 kms is a ridiculous distance to ride on a bike. We felt the love on the road all day today with passing motorists cheering us on. My bottom spent most of today urging me to consider badminton as an alternative form of exercise.
With 30 kms to go, Bruce, Al, and I were floundering like barbels in dry river bed in Gokwe. Dick of the Day Dave was still annoyingly fresh. We rode around a corner and there to greet us was Neal Leach, our fellow pair of Old Legs. We rode around another corner and there was Brendon Mitchell and 20 plus cyclists from the Flying Eagles and Lounge Lizard riding clubs. They gave us an escort into Qalisa, our Bulawayo home from home , at a pace that would ordinarily result in urine test failure. (I didn’t know that bikes could go that fast.)
Thank you, thank you, thank you to the Qalisa community for welcoming us into their homes with such warmth.
Tomorrow we have a rest day and then on to Botswana. We’ve extended an Old Legs invitation to Ian Khama, Botswanan pensioner and avid bike rider. We would be hugely honored to have him join our peloton for one of our Botswana legs. Fingers crossed. And toes.
Thank you to everyone out there following the Old Legs Tour. Your encouragement and support is the best muti for buggered legs.
Many are asking how they can donate -
Bank Transfer Dontations
Bank: Ecobank Zimbabwe Ltd
Branch: Bradfield Bulawayo | Branch Code: 004
Account Name: Bulawayo Help Network
Account Number: 0041087600345101
To donate using PayNow visit
Donate through Ecocash
Donate through Just Giving
Finally a huge shout out to Ryan Moss from Rebel Media Guys for your help, above and beyond. Check out footage from today on www.oldlegstour.co.zw
Until the next blog from Plumtree
Eric Chicken Legs de Jong